Lost in Translation

This past Wednesday was the last day of one of the earliest SAIC employees in the RSNF program, Calipha Abdur Rahman. He was in-charge of the A/V department, and virtually the Admiral’s right hand man.

Along with Abdullah Brooks, who also winded down his career a week earlier, these two had been part of the program for over 45yrs between the two. It definitely was the close of a chapter within the RSNF-SAIC saga. Only a few remnants remain of the initial contract, and even they’ve stated their intentions of leaving.

One of the aforementioned, Baseer, decided to make Calipha’s last day truly memorable, something where Calipha wouldn’t have a choice but to say he had a ball at work. Between Arnie and Baseer, the two of them decided to try something new, VERY new.

The grocery stores here sell all sorts of meats … rabbits, ostriches, camel, deer, the list goes on. Of course, they also sell many of the various body parts of every animal, and in partcular sheep testicles (nuts, balls, whatever you will) were spotted by our two daring heroes.

Baseer is a fairly good cook (of course, no comparison to yours truly, but I mean, is there any competition from anyone?!?) and he prepared this “delicacy” Sliced and diced em babies, doused them in lemon juice and various other spices and sauteed them with a healthy portion of tomatoes and onions.

Wednesday, it was the talk of the workplace. Grown men were giggling hearing what they were being urged to try. Baseer was swearing on his reputation, and insisting that it tasted like chicken liver

[On a sidenote, I feel really bad for the chicken. I mean, think about it … if a chicken heard us talking when we try other meats, and all it hears is “tastes just like chicken” … it must think … well, why the hell are you killing me then?!? Everything else tastes like me, leave me the hell alone!!!”]

The older guys were the quickest try, of course they have to set the example for the youngins as the daring, macho image of a male. It was proclaimed edible by all, and Baseer’s interpretation of the preparation was lauded over and over again. Enthused by such positive enforcement, Baseer took it upon himself to make sure that everyone had some balls in their mouth … walking around the SSC with his offering.

I was under the weather so he spared me, but it was gnawing at me that am I not man enough to try this? I mean … everyone around me is eating it, and nobody has dropped yet … so what you waiting for?

I did the curious calf number … walked around the plate a few times, knelt in, smelled the contents, smiled and walked off. Doesn’t smell too bad, but come on … it’s freakin BALLS!

Curiosity is a very bad thing in many situations … making you do things you know you don’t want to do, but at the same time, you must. When no one was looking, I took a small piece of bread, took a piece and shoved it down. Now the initial reaction when you try something innately offensive is the urge to throwup, or the gag reflex. Both kicked in, and I could feel my stomach churn.

Fortunately, just then I actually tasted the “meat” (?!?) and honestly, I was pleasantly surprised … it was actually damn good. Kinda spongy, kinda chewy, and overall tasty!

So yes … now I can add another exotic delicacy to my growing list of wierd things consumed: desert lizard, zebra, ostrich, goat eyeball, so on and so forth.

And now I’m sitting here thinking how the hell did I write so much about this?!?

The next entry will be great … I promise!

This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 19th, 2006 at 12:25 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.